Freedom

                The story “Ribbons” by Laurence Yep tells the tale of an 11 year old girl named Stacey whose life flips upside down when her grandmother moves in. In the story Stacey’s mother creates rules and becomes childlike when her mother is around. These rules limit her daughter’s life and interrupt it for the time being. This act in general causes people to ask: Do parents really want their kids to be independent?

                Independence is something we as humans strive for. Parents seem to want their children to be independent, but at the same time they want their children to depend on them. It’s a trade that not many parents are clear about. Independence can be a terrific thing but it can also be a very destructive thing; although there are some people who go through life clinging onto everyone they meet, it doesn’t mean it’s an okay thing.

                There are two ways someone can be independent as well as dependent. Someone can be independent and be respected because of their success as an individual. There are also people who are independent who are making damaging choices because they’re too independent or they’re being independent in a risky way. People could also be dependent in a unpleasant way, where they cling and never do anything without another person. But being dependent in a good way might mean they could ask for help if they needed it.

                In “Ribbons” Stacey’s mom applies these rules and forces them onto her kids. Living your life around your grandmother isn’t really independent if it’s a forced system. Stacey’s mom refuses to stand up to her own mother, acting like a child (when her mother made a comment about the stairs) because of how her mother saved her from Communists. She doesn’t really act independent when her mother is around in fear of being inadequate. Although she has a family of her own and is an adult she still follows her mother’s every order.

                Personally I think parents should want their children to have independence at the right age, being independent too young or too old can change their maturity and attitude towards everything. Stacey’s mom shouldn’t have set so many rules for her kids; their grandmother should love them no matter what. She needs to act like an adult around her mother, not giving in at every order like a child. Independence can be great, but in the wrong circumstances it can change everything. In this case though, Stacey should have been given the choice to be independent.